(The Teen) (Otto) (CJ)

Hmmmm..... All looking a bit guilty.
If you happen to notice the lovely mugshots up there...for those of you who visit regularly(those who are new to my parts) there is a child missing from the line up.

Well, for ONE, she wasnt present during said violations of the Household Regs.
TWO, Come on, she is the girl AND the baby. Even if she was present the powers that be{mainly known as Daddy} give her automatic immunity. { Annd...who said I ran a democracy???}

The evidence:
Well, isn't it just amazing how those pictures were/are somehow missing? No longer available. I think they had inside help! Just a hunch!

FEAR NOTHING! This Judge and jury{also the judge appointed lawyers for both sides} saw the evidence first hand. So add eyewitness to the list of duties in this process.

The crimes?
I am going to start this, with just a tiny little thought process that crosses my mind from time to time{okay daily, by seconds!}

"HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MINDS!"

Ahem.
First off...When you{you=the children as a group} engage in activities, when parents are NOT home...here are some guidelines.
1. CYA. As in cover your asses. Don't make it so obvious. Leaving spitballs{And any other activity as listed in the manual} stuck to the ceiling, the mirrors, walls, etc...is NOT CYA!
2.When you are the appointed babysitter, this means you shall NOT engage in said activities.
3. When you spill something or "accidentally" throw ketchup at your brother(s)...CLEAN IT...HIDE IT....Mom will be home...
4. Do NOT put empty wrappers, soda cans, etc..BACK in the cupboard or fridge. It then becomes obvious how much food you have consumed.
5.Do NOT hide evidence in closets.
These are just a few of the guidelines. The manual is available for viewing, located in Mom's head. Please contact her if you really need to review!

Now, here is where all my years of going to college and pouring over those Psych books paid off. Along with all the practice I have had "tricking" people into compliance( that outside the box thing) rolled into inexperience, desperation of parenting.

Oh I have forgotten a few kids involved here.
AB C
You may have met them before.

A. Idontknow
B. Notme
C. Ididntdoit

Yes, I have spoken of these three little darlings before here in my slice of blog heaven. It also became apparent to me, that you have kids with the same names. {Funny must have been some planetary alignment thingy.} and you may have their cousins residing with you!

I have decided to take a different approach with the children to whom I have given birth {Respectfully Suspects 1,2 and 3}--Of course I believe that I gave birth to them, yet I do not rule out the possibilities of them being changelings.

A. Straws(unwrapped) in various lolcations throughout the house. Not ONE even remotely close to a garbage pail.
B. Little tiny white balls, wet balls, stuck in various spaces of the house.
C. Various other infractions.
I opened my mouth to utter these words, "Why are there spitballs all over the house?" EXCEPT, I did NOT utter those words. I stopped. I thought very carefully. Choosing my words wisely.
And here they be:
"Hey guys?"
"Ya Ma?"...in unison
"Have you seen your siblings, Idontknow, Notme and Ididntdo it?"
blink blink{for sound effects think cartoon tink tink}
"There seems to be spitballs all over the house...imagine that. I was wondering if you three knew where these guys are hiding?"
blink blink {speechless, mouths agape}

I didn't have to set myself up for a frustrating back and forth about who did and why it was. It just was. Ask a silly question, get a silly answer.
I didn't have to escalate the frustration, by feeding into the battle of who was going to clean it. {All three rose from their seats, quickly, quietly and calmly...and cleaned it}
I didn't have to yell, to threaten. I stood with a queer little smirk across my face. Scared them too... I think.
There was no whining, pouting or stomping.
I won! I beat them at their game!!! Yeah!!!!!!
Sometimes, ya gotta just get down in the sandbox and play. It just may work! LOL

Peace
Jodi

Labels: Guidelines, Have You Lost your MINDS?., Humor Me, Motherhood, Normal?, The Joys of Parenting